Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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