Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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