I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
im holly from the hills drunk
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Randomize