I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize