I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
