long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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