More tranny stories later!
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
