There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
