Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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