Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
