I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
