it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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