): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
