her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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