what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize