Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
