Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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