every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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