I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
