Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We named our party play list daddy issues
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize