also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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