i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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