Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
