HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
third nipple confirmed
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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