normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I need moral support for this bender
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
