Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
