Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
