do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
