Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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