man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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