Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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