hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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