I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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