Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I have feelings that need drinking.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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