spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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