she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I cut my penus on the lid.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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