I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
