the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
