Don't you send me to vm
wakey wakey hands off snakey
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Last time i carry you out of a forest
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
i think my cat just said my name.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
