I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
