I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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