I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
