Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
