White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
