When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
