i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
