Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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