I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
