I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
