The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
