i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize